A week off

I have been a bit of a workaholic this year. I have a holiday entitlement of up to 30 days and next year I can have the same, 'cos I am entitled to take up to 5 days over. But even with those 5 days taken next year, I still have not taken enough time off so this week I took the rest of my entitlement to ensure that I didn't lose any days.

I haven't done a lot.
Monday - Nicki's Birthday. Got up early to see her open her presents. Unfortunately, our present had not arrived. (See below) Then, Christmas Shopping. Got most of the presents and did it within my budget so far. I feel great about that but I still need to get Christmas Cards organised, wrapping presents, ensuring that I have the Christmas Dinner organised, and ordered!!!!
Tuesday - didn't do a lot at all. Rested for most of the morning to be honest.
Wednesday - Dug a bit on the allotment. Lunchtime - went to Costco with my father. Nice to do something together, just the two of us, even if it was forcing ourselves around a crowded store.
Thursday - Visited a friend from work who is on longterm sick. Came home and cleaned the kitchen and the oven. Hated doing it but pleased with the results.
Friday - today - going to see a friend who has just had a new baby.
OK - it sounds like I have been busy - but I have, intentionally, not rushed. This has been a good week for me. Still a little fragile around the edges though.

Tomorrow - back to the grind of a normal weekend. Nicki will need taking to her keyboard lessons early tomorrow. She is doing so well at it. Next year she will be taking her Grade 6 Keyboard. As a birthday present, we bought her an 88 key keyboard to enable her to play more piano pieces. Unfortunately, the warehouse didn't get it to us in time, hence my comments above. The company didn't immediately apologise for their mess up and it took about 3 emails before they even ventured to offer us an apology. Still waiting for the keyboard to arrive, but I am assured that it has been despatched from the warehouse. We wait, in anticipation.

The ship has sailed

My father counted up his sympathy cards today - over 250 of them. They are full of wonderful expressions of how much my mother touched lives. Memories of her as a child, as a nurse, as a confidant and friend.
One of the sympathy cards that was received contained the following:

I am standing at the seashore and watching a ship. It is large and bright and glinting in the sun. Myself, and many others, wish it's passenger good sailing, and to say "goodbye" - but going where?

Just out of sight - that is all.
I want that ship not to sail. I want it to stay, but it is sailing away with it's passenger - never to return.

I stand here, with others, waving, saying "farewell", "goodbye", "God Bless", and what I need to remember is that there are other voices, other hands excitedly waving on the other side of the horizon and joyfully singing out.....

"Here she comes!"

It's been a hard week

My mother died on 5th November and her funeral was yesterday. It's funny how you have to psych yourself up for these things. On Sunday, I was in such an emotional state that I could not think right. Friends at church gave comfort. One even said "Enjoy the day!"
I couldn't understand that comment. In fact, I really couldn't believe that she had actually said it. She explained that there would be people at the funeral who would provide me with more memories of my mother to treasure. I must confess, I still didn't really understand what she was saying...... until yesterday.

The day was hard. We decided on having the cremation service first, followed by a thanksgiving service at my mother's home church. It was incredible. We, the family, knew that my mother was well respected, but didn't realise how much until we arrived at the crematorium. People were queueing to get in!!! When we had taken our places, there were nearly 100 people still standing at the back!
The thanksgiving service was just the same. The church seated around 120. Nearly 30 people were standing in the main building, with another 50 seated in the overflow, and another 30 or so standing in the foyer! My mum touched so many lives while she was here. I just didn't realise.
Then, I began to understand what had been said to me. In the middle of the tears, I began to learn things about my mother that I didn't know before; her life as a surgical nurse, the number of couples that she touched at the Marriage Encounter weekends that she ran with my dad, acts of kindness that she did for the neighbours who she always looked out for, the church family that she belonged to, parties and fun that she had with cousins and other family members. I was enjoying it - learning about my mum, and adding to my memory bank.
It was hard work, talking to so many people, and I was incredibly tired at the end of the day. But we mourned and cried for my mum as we finally let her go, and we celebrated her life and thank God that she is now with her precious Lord, along with her mother and our little daughter, Jessamy.

A picture came to me soon after she died. Our daughter, Jess, was greeting my mother in heaven saying "Hi Grandma, you're here. Let me show you around".

It has been a while...

.....since my last post. A lot has happened to me, but not on the flying front. I think this blog needs to take a change in direction, so from now on it won't be limited to flying. Sorry about that.
Life has been a bit hard of late. My mum died of pancreatic cancer on 5th Nov. She had been unwell for a while but we didn't know what with until about 3 months ago. Since knowing, she went downhill quite fast - particularly the last week. For a cancer that can be incredibly painful, she was spared all of that and died peacefully at home with my dad by her side. The funeral is on Thursday.
OK, I still have my father with me, but someone described loosing a parent as like "loosing the lead in a convoy" - there was no-one at the front anymore. I feel a bit like that at times. Someone said that I was now to be the organiser of the family but I don't know whether I should accept that label. My father is still around and I have a brother nearby. We are all capable of organising our own lives. I think my father might object to me taking over, and I don't think I should do that. Maybe as he gets older, but not just now.

Feeling More Positive

I think I needed time to get over my disappointment and to work things through. I have received encouragement from family, friends, and others who have responded to this blog. So, it looks like it could be motion sickness tablets, or wrist bracelets that work on acupuncture points. I need to keep trying.

Attitude helps too. I am not an advocate of "think positive and everything will work out OK", but you do have to have the right attitude. Sometimes, that takes an effort to change. I'm sure that you have heard the phrase "Choose your Attitude" and you really do have to do that - everyday. It does affect how your day plays out. I am an optimist by nature, but even I have to be real. And that is where I am right now, trying to keep in touch with reality.

On a more fun note - the Red Bull Air Race competition was in Longleat, UK, this weekend. Wow!! Some of those pilots were pulling nearly 12G!!!! How do they do it? AND NOT BE SICK!!! I wasn't able to go myself, but watched the TV coverage.